I’m having one of those days. One of those bad days where I find myself completely and utterly jealous over my friends’ engagements. One of those days when I find myself wondering why my friends can be in serious relationships and on their way down the aisle, and I’m just waiting for the right man to come into my life. One of those days when I get seriously discouraged.
I can’t be the only one, right?
Well, if I am, that’s pretty sad and I should probably work on that.
I know the Bible warns against jealousy and coveting after what your neighbor has, but sometimes it’s hard, right? Like really, really hard.
And I get jealous. And annoyed. And wonder why everyone has a boyfriend but me. I get discouraged. I get aggravated.
How many other adjectives can describe what I just said? A lot. But I won’t make you sit and read all of them. Not today at least.
When I have days like this, I have to sit down with my Bible and have a nice, long chat with God. Tell Him exactly how I’m feeling and why I’m feeling that way.
Tell him that I’m angry that I don’t have a boyfriend. Yes, I do that. Yes, I’m ashamed to say that. Really, I am.
But it’s the truth, and it’s how I feel.
And I know that God is sitting up in Heaven shaking his head wondering why I can’t get it through my thick skull that He has everything under control and knows exactly how my life is going to turn out.
And I just have to trust Him with that.
I have to trust that He has everything under control. And by everything I mean everything. When I’m going to meet my future husband, when I’m going to get engaged, and when I’m going to get married.
And until those days come, I’m just going to have to sit back and be patient and wait. And prepare myself.
And by “prepare myself”, I mean try really hard to not be awkward when I meet the man I’m going to marry.
Because, I’m afraid it’ll go something like this:
